I can't believe how much my niece has grown over the past year. It seems like only yesterday when I helped my sister-in-law push this growth out of her vagina give birth to this beautiful, tiny, 6 pound baby. She is seriously one of the cutest things I've ever seen.

Still doesn't make me want to have one, though. Sorry, Mike!

[Edit]
Now here's a long video of Madeline eating a chicken bone. Enjoy!

[/Edit]

Austin is cold. Well, more specifically, my room is cold.


I've had to sleep with sweatpants, a t-shirt, sweatshirt, socks, and two down comforters for the past week. Oh, and I had to put my fatty cat on top of me just to keep me warm.


Why don't I just turn on the heat, you ask? Well, it's already on, and I'm afraid if I turn it on even higher, my roommates room might catch on fire. I don't get how in a small 1000 square-foot apartment, the temperatures could be so drastically different from one room to the next.


I think I just need my cuddle buddy to keep me warm in my tiny twin bed.

Remember when I said that Blogger is the shit, and it is, and forever will be, much better, more sophisticated, and much prettier than Xanga ever will be? And remember when all of you said, "no way"?

Case in point:

A "xangsta"? Really, Vivian?

Now all you bitches are turning to Blogger finally. FINALLY. I've been doing this for almost 6 years, and it's about goddamn time you guys SAW THE TRUTH... or something.

No more shitty music playing in the background, no more images so distracting you can't read the text, no more ugly emoticons. Hurray!

Today, I applaude you, Vivian, Stephanie, and Lee-Ting, for coming to the other side, the other prettier, more sophisticated, BETTER side.

Now, we've just got to convert everyone else.

To my Georgia sisters,

Thank you for driving 15 hours all the way to Austin for convention, despite only spending a mere 32 hours here. Oh, and sorry about that whole, "really bad weather" thing. Can't wait to see y'all again over summer!

Jeez. That's a lot of sweatshirts.
All of us girls in front of the tower. Yeah, don't mind the blistering cold and rain.

You know you're an emotional trainwreck when you cry to an episode of Futurama.


FUTURAMA, for cryin' out loud.


But in my defense, it was a good one.

Today at work, I met the first woman to have her wedding in space.



I shit you not. I can't even make something like that up even if I tried.



She will be married in 2008... IN OUTER SPACE. This whole concept absolutely blows my mind. I have so many questions for this woman-on-crack! Like:

What are you going to wear? [Edit: Apparently, she's trying to have this whole ordeal nationally televised as a reality-TV show, from planning, all the way to the actually ceremony. She's going to have a nation-wide contest to see who gets to design her dress, as well as who gets to marry them.]

Who's going to marry you?

How much does it cost to get married in outer space, anyway? [Edit: According to her website, it'll cost $500,000. Which... is surprisingly not that much considering there are people out there who would drop a few million on their weddings... and it's here on planet Earth.]

Who's taking you up there?

Are you going to have bridesmaids and groomsmen? [Edit: No, she's not.]

ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR DAMN MIND?!



God, I love Austin.

This is the shit we do at work when we're bored and it's slow:

"How are you going to find your way to St. Tropez if you read the map backwards?"


How close this looks to that image in the back is uncanny.



See? Don't you want to work with us?

Tammy's Top Seven List for 2006
Lists from 2003, 2004, and 2005

Albums

Red Hot Chili Peppers - Stadium Arcadium

Outkast - Idlewild

Justin Timberlake - FutureSex/LoveSounds

Panic! At the Disco - A Fever You Can't Sweat Out [Even though I like the whole album, just one song is what did it for me: "Lying is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off.]

Janet Jackson - 20 Y. O.

Danity Kane - Danity Kane [God, I should be fired for admitting I even like this CD. But seriously? It's actually pretty damn good considering it's by a pop group that was picked on national TV. Way to go, Diddy.]

Tool - 10,000 Days

Overplayed Radio Songs

Kelis - Bossy

Yung Joc - It's Goin' Down

Cherish - Do It, To It

Justin Timberlake - Sexy Back

The Pussycat Dolls - Buttons

Kanye West - Gold Digger

Jamie Foxx - Unpredictable

Movies

The Departed

Little Miss Sunshine [Just saw this movie yesterday with Jenny - loved it.]

Clerks II

The Devil Wears Prada [How cliche is it for me to list this movie?]

Mission Impossible III [Tom Cruise may be a little crazy, but it's still a great movie.]

Inside Man [God, it felt like forever since I've seen this movie. I should watch it again fo sho.]

V for Vendetta

Books

Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs - Chuck Klosterman

Naked Pictures of Famous People - Jon Stewart

Pledged: The Secret Life of Sororities - Alexandra Robbins

Grand Master SuDoku 2 - Wayne Gould [Don't laugh. I LOVE Sudoku.]

Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini

Unfortunately, I did not read as much as I should have in 2006. I feel dum.

Events

Making out with Mike at midnight last New Years. Turns out, I'm currently in the longest winter fling, EVER.

Summer in NorCal. Words can't even begin to describe...

Turning 21... and STILL getting turned down at Maggie Mae's.

ASR Convention in HOTlanta, Georgia.

Seeing all 10 of my beautiful Lambdas cross.

Playing Catchphrase every Thursday night at 3-0-fuckin'-5.

Falling in love again. Awww. Gay.

Gifts

My sexy Canon PowerShot SD700 IS camera [From my Mikeys!]

An 30G white IPod [Thanks, Andrew!]

A GORGEOUS diamond necklace [Thanks, Momzilla!]

My new running shoes, cause Lord knows I need 'em [Thanks, Grandma.]

An awesome HAND-MADE memory board [From my favorite Foo-Dong.]

My uh... "Rabbit" [Thanks, Mike.]

Getting promoted to Visual Merchandiser at J. Crew [Thanks, Heidi.]

Pictures



Quotes

"Jimmies!" - Me and Mike

"Sometimes we put up walls. Not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to knock them down." - PostSecret

"I stand by this man because he stands for things. Not only for things, he stands on things. Things like aircraft carriers, and rubble, and recently flooded city squares. And that sends a strong message that no matter what happens to America, she will always rebound with the most powerfully staged photo-ops in the world." -Comedian Stephen Colbert on President Bush

sotozenmike: you only like me for my fancy pants!

"Pee-paw, you look like velvet." - Monica

"Hey... does this rag smell like chlorform to you?" - Best pick-up line in the world.

“He a very wise man and very strong - although perhaps not so strong as his father Barbara." - Borat, on President Bush

I've worked every single day since last Monday (excluding Christmas) - not just at Barton Creek, but at Highland Mall as well. I'm fuckin' worn out. I'm so sick of J. Crew - the clothes, the visuals, the clientelle, the "I bought my girlfriend this jacket at full price but now it's 40% off, can't I just return it and buy it again with the discount?"

Going home couldn't have come at a better time. I'm flying back to Nashville tomorrow afternoon and will be there for a week. So if you're there, I better see you motherfuckers.

Can't wait, can't wait!

Dear lady who would not spend $3.24 on a really cute tank top,

40 percent off of $4.99 does not equal a dollar. And since when have you not paid a sales tax while living in Texas? Please learn some fucking 3rd grade math. I don't know how you made it this far in life without learning simple arithmetic.

Sincerely,
Tammy

Wow. I did not expect to get 7 cookies by Christmas. You guys continually surprise me. Guess I'm gonna have to start finding good stories to write about for the new year. In the spirit of this holiday, I leave you all with quite possibly, the BEST Christmas message of all time from my dear friend, Stephanie (hope you don't kill me!).

And yes, I think your tongue ring is very sexy.

Hope you all had a great Christmas (and didn't spend half of it being hungover from playing Kings with wine the night before)!

Love,
Me

If I can get 7 cookies from 7 different people by New Years, I'll start writing here on a regular basis again.

Ready?... GO.

I got my car towed, booted, and ticketed - all in less than 24 hours.

God, I hate life so much right now it's not even funny.




But at least I have you, Amp'd Mobile guy:

I've worked a total of 44.6 hours these past 5 days just to make the store look good. I think my life revolves around J. Crew now, because at this point, I see and talk to my co-workers more than I see and talk to my own friends. It's kind of pathetic, really... But at least my store is TOTALLY prettier than yours now.


Weekend, I welcome thee.

I get this note on our front door today:

Dear Voyageurs Residents,

There has been a report of a peeping tom in the area. If you witness ANY suspicious activity related to this incident or of any variety we ask that you please contact the police at 911 with the uttmost urgency and then please notify us.

Also make sure to take any and all possible security precautions. Always lock doors and windows, even when you're at home. Keep track of any spare keys. And never hesitate to call the police if you suspect something is potentiall unsafe or unlawful.

Then my next door neighbor proceeds to tell me that she was the one who called in the peeping tom. She caught him looking in on her window with a flash light.

Greeeeaaat.

[Edit]
p u ff y b u s h: econo lodge?
p u ff y b u s h: and peeping toms. haha
p u ff y b u s h: austin is classy
[/Edit]