On the topic that is pants.

S e h n E 13: you don't put on your pants rite?
SooshiMooshi : apparently not
S e h n E 13: oh
S e h n E 13: don't you think that by now you should know how?
SooshiMooshi : i thought so too
S e h n E 13: you should really have sarah teach you or something
S e h n E 13: b/c that is quite embarrassing that you do not know how
SooshiMooshi : will you put them on for me?
S e h n E 13: i can do it for you once
S e h n E 13: but you really should learn how to
S e h n E 13: and not be dependent upon others
S e h n E 13: you won't always have people there for you to put on your pants
SooshiMooshi : i know
S e h n E 13: it's almost like putting on your underwear. do you not know how to put on your underwear either?
SooshiMooshi : no, i know how to do that
SooshiMooshi : i think
S e h n E 13: well, its the same concept
SooshiMooshi : ohhh
SooshiMooshi : but pants are long
S e h n E 13: yeah, they are
S e h n E 13: you just have to be patient and wait for you legs to go all the way through
S e h n E 13: sometimes i sing a song while i put my legs through... it helps to pass time
S e h n E 13: i find that windpants are easiest
S e h n E 13: so you may want to start off with those
S e h n E 13: it took me a while to master tight jeans
S e h n E 13: that is why most of my jeans are loose
S e h n E 13: but i'm sure that once you figure it out you'll have it down in no time
S e h n E 13: and if you don't, then... you are just stupid.

[Edit: David said, "You gotta put your butt in the butt part!"]