Monday, February 25, 2002

I was looking everywhere for my pencil and extremely frustrated that I couldn't find it because I always lose my pencils and have to get a new one. As I am getting ready for bed, I took my hair down and found what I was looking for. I had used my pencil to put up my hair. I really need to stop doing that.

Sunday, February 24, 2002

Friend 1: Yeah. And so this guy who climed Mt. Everest got such bad frostbite on his nose that doctors had to cut it off and grow another nose out using his shoulder.
Me: They had to build one out of his shoulder?
Friend 2: Yeah. Who nose how doctors did it.

Ahh... I always love a good pun.

Ohh my god... How on earth did Afroman's Because I Got High get nominated for a Grammy for best rap solo performance?! Ugh. I hate people.

Saturday, February 23, 2002

Dream Kitty is a neat little online store for over-priced Japanese-made products. I like most of the stuff but... Helloy Kitty? Overrated. But cute. Tare Panda? This one's my fave. Mashimaro? Cute. Kogepan? Dumb looking, but I can deal. Afro Ken? What the hell? It's a dog. With an afro. And it has a bio and a family tree. Um... Then again, Kogepan is a bread dude and I don't know what's up with that. Those crazy Japanese. =)

This is so unbelievably cute... It looks huggable.



I want that!!!!! Someone grow me one. Please?

[Fun Fact] See how the bunny looks like a marshmellow? That's how it got its name! Mashimaro! It sounds like my mom saying marshmellow. Yay for accents. =)

It's almost 2 in the morning. I'm bored. I play Minesweeper.

My best Minesweeper times:
-Beginner: 4 seconds
-Intermediate: 45 seconds
-Expert: 140 seconds

Ha! Beat that. Unless your name is Sivan because then you are non-human and therefore get an advantage.

Friend 1: What are you eating?
Me: A hot pocket.
Friend 1: Oh, is it crispy, hot, crunchy, tender, yummy?
Me: No. It's not any of those.
Friend 2: I don't know... It looks pretty crispy and tender to me.

Friend 2 then proceeded to draw a hot pocket. Then drew the crispy, hot, crunchy, yummy, tenderness that enriches the Hot Pocket, with sound effects for each adjective.

Friend 2 is so unbelievably cool.

Weezer was wonderful, as expected. I almost fell asleep during the opening acts, Ozma and Saves the Day, though. But at least that got me pepped up for what I was there for. You have *no* idea how much I wanted to be moshing down on the floor but we were with the rest of the losers that got upper level seats. But. It was a great concert nonetheless. It would have been even better if we weren't sitting in front of 5 eighth graders who would not shut up about which girl was hot... and if we were't surrounded by chain/pot smokers.

Em: Woo! Look at all of the non-smoking signs...
Guy in front of us: Hey uh... Do you have a smoke?

Thursday, February 21, 2002

Dude. In the midst of working on my horrible terrible Progressive Era essay, I just remembered that I'm going to the Weezer concert tonight. I had completely forgotten all about that. I got tickets for it more than a month ago and I thought that the concert was gonna be on January 21st, not February. ("I don't do months.") And I guess I just didn't think about it until now. Whee! What a fun suprise.

Wednesday, February 20, 2002

International day is coming up pretty soon at our school... My friend and I were thinking of some cleverly dumb things that I could do...

1. Make those little fortune tellers for everyone. The ones that when you lift the flaps, it will say "you suck".

2. Wear thick glasses, sit down at a table with a huge calculus book and an equally large physics book. Look busy. When someone comes to ask me something about my country, I will just reply with, "No! Don't bother me!! Can't you see that I'm trying to figure this out?!"

3. Talk with an extremely thick Chinese accent. If someone questions me about it, I will say, "I no understan-duh what you tawking bout."

4. Dance around and make sporadic kung-fu moves to the ever popular "Everybody loves kung-fu fighting." Have a friend in the background hit a gong every now and then.

5. Have a chinese make-over party. Get some black-colored hair spray and some tape. Who ever wants a make-over will get their hair spray painted black and have their eyes stretched to the side and taped to keep that in place. Voi-la! Chinese! Just imagine everyone looking like that. Haunting...

6. Dye my hair blond, have cosmetic surgery to enlarge my eyes, wear blue contacts. That's what they do in Taiwan anyway. They want to be white.

Just for the record, I'm not gonna be in international day. What a waste so such wonderful ideas, no?

Monday, February 18, 2002

Girl scout cookies are so yummy. Mmm Samoas... mmm Thin Mints... mmm Tagalongs...

Saturday, February 16, 2002

It's been awhile. Too caught up with stuff and some more stuff. But to make up for what I've missed... Happy (late) Valentine's Day! (I love you David! ^_^) And for my fellow yellows... Happy (late again) Chinese New Year!!! We had the big CNY celebration tonight. It was actually pretty fun. I saw some people that I haven't seen since... well, last CNY. But it couldn't have been as exciting without my friends. So I was with my Chinese school people on stage, getting ready to sing in front of about 500 people.

Friends in the audience (screaming loudly): WoOOooOoOOoo!!! Go Tammy!!! Yeeeeeeeeah!! Whooooooo!!!!
Me: Uh...
Friends: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Guy next to me: Are those your friends?
Me: No...
Friends: I LOVE YOU TAMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOO!!!!
Me: .... (Ohmygodkillmenow) Must be another Tammy.

And of course, after the whole thing was over...

Random man/woman I don't know: Wow! You really popular!
Me: (AlltheChinesepeoplehatemenow.) Heh... Thanks...

*Sigh* Can't wait until next year...

Friday, February 8, 2002

An observation from the Olympics open ceremony tonight: My mom and I were watching all of the different countries do their little parade strut. Lots of countries whee fun go faster. And then China comes out and my mom and I were like, "Yay!", and you know what happens? They cut to a goddamn commercial! DAMN YOU AMERICANS! (Hi. I'm gonna get myself shot.) No, but I liked when the U.S. came out because they had lots of people. Really.

"At least Taiwan didn't get cut off..." -Me
"Well, that's because there's only 4 people." -Mom

Wednesday, February 6, 2002

This is what my day consisted of: Woke up. Looked outside. Clear. I think to myself, where the hell is my snow? It's 30 degrees outside, I want my snow. This weather is totally unacceptable. We have 5 built-in snow days, let's use them! But alas, I still have school. Go to school. Near the end of 1st period, I look outside. It is snowing. A lot. And I think, why, God, why do you taunt us so? I can just see him up there throwing snow down going, "Ha! I'm making it snow! Oh, but you're still in school. And the snow's *not* gonna stick so you will remain in school. Muahaha. Hey, what are you gonna do? I'm God." I did a little snow dance last night, and I guess I should have been more specific. If it just snowed at 6am instead of 8. We would be out. 2nd period rolls around, I sit by the window, wondering what we're still doing in school. It is snowing a lot. But it's not sticking to the roads because people planned ahead and salted the roads yesterday. The office comes on the intercom a few times, but with meaningless announcements. But still. Everytime we all hear it come on, you can see the hopeful looks on everyone's faces, and then see the hope shattered when we realize that we are not getting out of school. We are pissed because we know that every goddamn school around us is already out. This is the third time that this has happened to metro. 3rd and 4th period seem to drag on forever, and there's my teacher desperately trying to keep our attention:
Teacher: Blah blah blah Progressive Era blah blah blah
Us: Snow!
Teacher: Blah blah blah Spanish American war blah blah blah.
Us: Snow!
Teacher: Come on guys, focus. Blah blah Manifest Destiny blah.
Us: Snow!
Teacher: Stop looking out the window. You need to learn this stuff for the test on Friday.
Us: Snow!
By now, when you look outside, the buildings that are kidna far away are lost in a sea of white. It is snowing really hard by now. The grass, cars, tress, roofs, are all covered in it. But you know what's not? The goddamn roads. 5th period. My teacher has given up on us, she doesn't even want to try to teach us something, cause what's the use? 11:32 am, we hear the principle come over the intercom, telling us that schools will be closed at 12:15. Finally. It's about time. I left early, cause what's the point of waiting until 12:15 if we're getting out anyway? I come home and slept for a good 4 hours. So. That concludes my day. Oh, but one last thing: Garcia, you are a jackass. We hate you.

Monday, February 4, 2002

So as "Mr. Sandman" is incessantly playing over and over in my head (why? I don't know), I've come to wonder... Why are the guys asking Mr. Sandman to "make him the cutest that I've ever seen?" I mean, the obvious thought comes to mind... but... this song is froma long time ago! Hmm... Tough.

I hate it when I get an itch on my back, but I can't reach it so I'm like, twitching because it itches but I can't reach it so I can't scratch it so it gets worse. This is when my handy dandy back scratcher comes into play. Hurray for it's inventor. Who ever thought that a claw-like contraption would be so useful? Just another reason to why Asians are cool.

Aside from that, I only saw small bits of the Superbowl. But all I know, and all that I need to know is that the Rams lost. That's what they get for beating us two years ago.

Friday, February 1, 2002

So one of my friend's TA's name is Omar Butt. That's Mister Butt to you! One of my really good friend's last name is Ho. Now. If I can only get her to change her first name to Anita, or Ima. Granted, I don't know anyone named Ima. But hey! It'd be funny! (God. I'm five.) Do you have a wonderful name? If so, you should submit it here.

Aside from silly names, I have a silly song stuck in my head. "Mr. Sandman" by the Chordettes. But that one isn't nearly as funny as when Jack and Karen did it (from Will and Grace) in an episode 3 weeks ago. Download it. Sing along:

Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream (bum bum bum bum)
Make him the cutest that I’ve ever seen (bum bum bum bum)
Give him two lips like roses and clover (bum bum bum bum)
Then tell him that his lonesome nights are over.
Sandman, I’m so alone
Don’t have nobody to call my own
Please turn on your magic beam
Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream.
(Bum bum bum bum...)
Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream
Make him the cutest that I’ve ever seen
Give him the word that I’m not a rover
Then tell him that his lonesome nights are over.
Sandman, I’m so alone
Don’t have nobody to call my own
Please turn on your magic beam
Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream.
(Bum bum bum bum...)
Mr. Sandman (Yesss?) bring us a dream
Give him a pair of eyes with a come-hither gleam
Give him a lonely heart like Pagliacci
And lots of wavy hair like Liberace
Mr. Sandman, someone to hold
Would be so peachy before we’re too old
So please turn on your magic beam
Mr. Sandman, bring us, please, please, please
Mr. Sandman, bring us a dream.
(Bum bum bum bum...)

I'm just glad I got to say "bum" a lot. And I'll say again. God. I'm five.