You know what I did tonight? I played Insaniquarium.

For 2 fucking hours.

I know that 2 hours doesn't seem that long for a game, as some of you have been known to play Halo and the like for 17 hours straight. But in case you actually have a life and don't have the time to sit down and play this one, let me give you a quick rundown of what it's about.

It's a fishtank. You have fish. You feed the fish. Your fish gets big. Fish poops out money. You fight off aliens. The end.

I played this. FOR TWO HOURS.

But! I did take some neato screenshots for you!

So if you keep your fish alive long enough, they turn blue, and instead of pooping out coins, they poop out diamonds (which are worth more money). Woowee look how many diamonds!



I started getting bored of just my blue fish, so I decided to buy some more...



... A lot more? (Just for the record, you start off with only 2 fish.)



Finally, I got tired of this game, so I let my fish die. Only, I would probably do that in real life too. Because hey, fish are boring, and the only thing they're good for is being dipped in tartar sauce.


Sigh. I need friends.

And yet another Christmas has passed us by.

Did you all have a good one? Good food? Good presents? Good company?

Did grandma knit you another sweater with a giant neon bird on it again?

Anyway, my family threw a big party for church friends on Christmas Eve. A lot of people came, but I can't really tell you who all did because I was too busy eating and hovering by the ridiculous amounts of food all night. To celebrate the birth of our Lord and savior, I decided to become a huge fat fat fatty. Hurray!

If you weren't invited because you weren't cool enough and Jesus hates you, you definitely missed out.

Aside from that, Santa must have accidently put me on the "Good" list this year because I got all sorts of fabulous presents. What can I say, I'm a lucky girl.

Danny suggested that I take a picture and I obliged. Too bad I'm still using my shitastic camera phone instead of a real camera. Sigh.

[Closeup]


1. Nine West pink purse [kisses to Ruth and Esther]
2. Hilarious Slang Flashcards - Example of one [much love to Schmoopie]
3. Pac Sun furry purse [high-five to Big Steve]
4. Pink Liz Claiborne scarf [thanks to Momzilla]
5. Both Sondre Lerche CD's [hugs to David]
6. Burt's Bees Raspberry lip gloss and Bath & Body Work's Tutti Dolci lip gloss [much thanks to Hips for the gift certificate]
7. SanDisk 512mb MP3 Player [HUGE hugs to Momzilla and Andrew]

And the other gifts that couldn't be pictured:

8. 10 pounds
9. Watching Next Friday and Billy Madison on TBS
10. Slipping on ice flat on my ass. In broad-daylight. By a busy street.
11. Attempted Wal-Mart run
12. Watching Napoleon Dynamite [Favorite line from the movie: "I see you're drinking 1% milk. Is that because you think you're fat? Because you're not. You could probably be drinking whole milk."]
13. Sleeping with the familiar
14. Farting around with Momzilla

I'm spoiled, and I love it. :D

Neato links. My present to you.

Barcode Yourself. It's always reassuring to know that I am worth a whopping $6.79. [Via Sivan]

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is coming out in 2005. Woo hoo! [Via David]

AOL Translator. OMG DIS IZ SO KEWL!! OMG WTF LOLOL!!!1!11!! [Via Sean]

This is the only thing I want for Christmas this year. [Via Joy]

MissusJoyJangles: all these vibrators make me wanna poop

Scary Santas - Shit, I think I'd be crying too if I had to sit anywhere near some of those Santas.

Make more snow, bitch! Aww... silly elves, you know that is what you get when you try to run away, right? [Via Davezilla]

1 Night in China on DVD! Best part of the review: "Problem is, what we can see looks like a faggy bodybuilder with a mullet banging a handsome transsexual. The freak-show, circus-act, car-crash appeal heightens when Joanie pops her clit and it’s not only pierced, but looks like a mini-penis."

Other things. Because you've been good this year:

Oh my Bugs, what a big... sword you have!

Do these toys remind you of me? Because Stephanie immediately called me upon seeing them in the store. Granted, I got really excited and said "Oh I know!! A BOOBAH!!!" when she asked, "You know that toy... comes in different colors... looks kind of like a blob..." but that's beside the point.

You. Yes you. Are invited to go bowling with your favorite Tammy and Molly tomorrow tonight Wednesday night at 8pm at Melrose Lane. Consider it a semi-Hillsboro High School reunion. With half the awkwardness and small-talk. Yeah, so try to make it if you can. Plus, it'll spare me the trouble of calling your ass up and harassing you until you do come.

And a special thank you to Jon for making my page pretty in all browsers! [It's Firefox-friendly now!] You're my hero.

And with that, I'm out.

I've given in.

I tried not to, I really did. When all my friends began to do it, I told myself, "Self, it's easy to give into peer pressure, but think about it. Is this really what you want? Do you really want to throw away your future for a few minutes of self-gratification? Don't do it." And I resisted for months, while I saw almost all my friends slowly give in, one by one. And I was so good at it.

But I've cracked.

I couldn't hold myself back anymore. I just had to see what the hype was all about. So I gave in for a little taste of what they call "Heaven".

Hello, Facebook.

The current weather conditions for Brentwood, TN:

Aw hell no, I did not come from perfect 70 degree weather to this.

To my favorite Stephanie in the whole world...

Happy birthday, you. Wish I could be there to celebrate with you guys.

First and foremost, this girl is my hero. Julie - this reminds me of the time when you came to PCL with all those jello shots. What better than studying for finals? Studying for finals drunk.

So. Home. It's good to be back and just away from it all.

Although, I wish I could have shrunk you guys (you know who you are) and carried you in my pocket to come home with me.

Even though it's nice to sleep in, relax, eat homecooked meals, and watch ridiculous amounts of bad reality tv, I must admit it's still kind of boring.

And I've been home for less than 30 hours.

Yeah. The most exciting part of today was when my mom bought me a new bathmat. True story.

Sigh.

Nashville people - come home already.

In other news, I used to have really, really bad taste in music. Which isn't to say that my tastes in music are by any means spectacular as of now, but dear god, what was I thinking back then?

Shitty McShit CD's I've bought:

Korn - Life is Peachy
Korn - Issues [So I was a huge Korn fan, eat me.]
Puff Daddy and the Family - No Way Out [But I must say, this CD is better than any of the bullshit P. Diddy has come out with since.]
Joan Osborne - Relish [She came out with what, one decent song?]
Space Jam Soundtrack [Hahahaha]
Eiffel 65 - Europop [Wait no, this CD is awesome. Stephanie can back me up on this.]
Ma$e - Harlem World [I used to love this CD, not gonna lie.]
Brandy - (self-titled)
Children's Classic Film Favorites [You know how sometime other, less talented people will sing covers of good songs, and then they try to sell it? But in reality, it's just a really bootlegged version of the original? Yeah, that's what this CD is. I'm actually really suprised that Amazon even has it.]
Titanic Soundrack
Poison - Open Up and Say... Ahh! [IT'S MY BROTHER'S I SWEAR.]
Marilyn Manson - Mechanical Animals [All excuses for why I have this CD are rendered futile. All I can do is apologize for even owning it.]
Backstreet Boys - Black and Blue [BSB used to be so good. What happened? Oh, right, they became alcholics.]

Oh, don't even. I know you have some embarrassing CD's too.

This place is officially dead.

Not really, but I have completely run out of things to talk about. Maybe it's that my life is just a boring mess.

Or maybe it's that you smell. Bad.

Either way, I've kind of abandoned this place. [Although I must thank a certain someone for updating for me.]

So, what have I been doing these past few days?

Study, study, cry, study, shoot myself in the face with killer bees, cry, and then study some more. I had three exams last week, and now I'm busy preparing for my buttons and zippers final this Friday.

Yes. I'm studying buttons and zippers. Go ahead, laugh. I'll wait.

Done?

Okay.

Before you start giving me shit about how lame this class is (which I already know, is lame to the max), look at the shirt you're wearing right now, and tell me: what kind of fabric is it made out of, what fibers are used, is it fiber or piece dyed, what is the thread count, how is it put together, what type of seams are used to sew the raw edges, how many gores are there, are the sleeves set in-the-round or in-the-flat, are there buttons, if so what type of buttons, how are the buttons sewn on, what type of thread is used, how is the dimensional stability of the overall garment, and would you classify it as high quality or low? Then, ask yourself these same questions along with 500 more, pertaining to EVERYTHING YOU OWN.

And when you're done, take a notecard and run it across your eyeballs.

Because a papercut in my eye would feel a hell lot better than having to study this shit.

At least some people seek pleasure in their studying.

Maleko706: bio has phosphodiester bonds
Maleko706: cant beat that
Maleko706: god that just gave me a boner

Anyway, I'll be done on Friday. And I'm be going home on Sunday. And I. Can't. Wait.

I'll leave you with this picture I took in Taiwan:

in between our blindfold
a love forbidden lives,
and the sensation of skin on skin
tickles down my spine.
holding your hands,
softly tracing kisses
from your hands,
up your arms
to your neck, beneath your chin,
to your lips,
and the rhythm of our breaths,
meet in syncopation.
our tongues dance
in a soft tango
as two lovers finding the steps
to a duet sang by Eros

_______________________________________________________________

you know me already,
there isn't much here that you can't see.
nothing on the surface deceives,
not like the catepillar into butterfly scenario,
this is just me,
happily groovin' to the blastin' stereo.
live my life like a flip of the new dollar coins,
i'm brave like susan b,
but i trust in something else,
in my wings that yet to shape,
in my heart that boundlessly sails.
where i land, you'll see my tail,
where i'm going, i'm turning heads.

Good weekend. I love being home.

It's strange going back to a home that I'm not used to. But hey, new furniture is fun!

I've missed my mommy. I've especially missed shopping with my mommy.

Mmm. Hot pot. Lots and lots of hot pot.

SpongeBob SquarePants was awesome. No, really. To those of you who said otherwise, eat a fart.

Hurray for new things. New, shiny things.

Ask me for the time when you see me! Because I can tell you now!

My phone is officially the biggest sack of shit, ever.

It's weird not being able to scroll through my AIM buddy list over these breaks.

I've missed my friends. A lot. It was good seeing you again - NN, Big Steve, Emily, Schmoopie, Ethan, Mollsey, Rachel (for all 5 minutes), Bear, Ray, Dave, and Harry. Can't wait to see y'all again in two weeks.

Thomas - I'm sorry I stood you up. I'm such a flake. Forgive me.

Zetas + Stoopid - things are aren't the same without you guys. Come play with me over Christmas, break, yes?

Knock knock
     Who's there?
     Lil' Jon
     Lil' Jon who?
     Lil' Jon gettin' krunk for some breakfast burritos.

Happy [belated] Birthdays to my dearest Carly, Annie, and Mark!

Smashed + Hammered = Schmammered.

Yes, it is weird being in the same room with people from middle school that you never liked in the first place. Funny how some things never change.

I apologize for the lack of pictures. I'll post them as soon as I get them from Esther and Big Steve. Which will be like, never.

Hope you all had as good of a [much needed] break as I did. And now it's back to studying. For my three testes this week. Who has exams the week after Thanksgiving break? Honestly?

Sigh.

Two more weeks.

Merry Thanksgiving!





Eat lots. I plan on seeing all of you 10 pounds heavier by next Monday. Got it? Good.

43 Things I want to do before the new year.

List of Things #839

1. take fast shits
2. have sex with Eminem
3. exercise
4. make love on a beach
5. find my wonderwall
6. write better blogs
7. kiss more girls
8. eat more sushi
9. live life to the fullest
10. go on a romantic getaway
11. eat less french fries
12. learn how to scuba dive
13. study abroad
14. be nice to my step-brothers
15. call my mom more
16. love people
17. find more constellations
18. keep in touch with old friends
19. build up my tolerance
20. get high
21. attend more concerts
22. bong a beer
23. bake lots of chocolate chip cookies
24. spend less money
25. pick up painting again
26. fall in love again
27. go on more road trips
28. spend less time on AIM, and more time in person
29. procrastinate less
30. see Lion King on broadway
31. buy more CDs
32. go skinny dipping
33. eat more vegetables
34. get a fake ID
35. find a cure for the common cold
36. find a decent job
37. skydive
38. walk to more places
39. party with a celebrity
40. learn how to break dance
41. fix my sleeping schedule
42. learn how to play drums
43. work hard, play hard


What do you want to do?

[Edit]
As promised, pictures from this weekend are up. Mouseover for captions.
[Pics brought to you by Vivian, Sarah, and Jen]

Crazy night.

Formal was good. I love seeing everyone dressed up. Especially Stephanie in her cute pink halter.

Congratulations to the Thetas.

I am now the proud owner of the BIGGEST LESBIAN award and a Babes of Lowriders magazine. Thanks, guys. I really appreciate it.

The real party of course, didn't start until we all got back to our apartment. 311 was definitely the place to be last night.

Thanks to Julie for making those pink lemonade shots. They were delicious. So delicious that I was able to take over 15 of them.

"Hurry! Drink as many as you can! The cups are melting!"

Watching Nguyen do a keg stand was priceless.

Sucks to whoever I pushed into the Zeta square. Haha.

Sucks to whoever I pulled under the "mistletoe". Haha.

"These are my confessions, just when I thought I said all I can say..."

Someone vomited on MY HEAD. Not really, it was just water. But all hell would have been let loose if someone had puked on me.

"What is it with you Asians?"

Uhm... everything that happened later on that night becomes kind of fuzzy after this. Wanna help me piece it all together? Cool! Thanks!

Special thanks to Mark for being my date and making sure I was okay by the end of the night. You're super.

Pictures, of course, will be posted up later.





And after the show it's the after-party:





Haha. OWNED.





And from GB presents:

I have this problem.

No, it is not Gonorrhea. Haha, funny. Die.

I have this sleeping problem. And it is that I cannot go to bed earlier than midnight unless I plan on waking up two hours later, WIDE AWAKE AND NOT ABLE TO GET BACK TO SLEEP UNTIL 7 IN THE MORNING. An exception to this rule is, of course, if I was actually planning on waking up two hours later to say, study or something. If that's the case, then I will be able to sleep like a baby for 12 hours straight, wake up 10 minutes before my exam, scream, run to class, and then fail at life.

As you can see, I do not have a test tomorrow.

I am, however, wide awake, and it sucks because I know I'm not gonna be able to fall back asleep for another few hours.

The world works in cruel ways.

But! There are some advantages to being up at this hour. Some being:

Wendy's late-night drive-thru and their 99 Cent Value Menu. Mmm. French fries and Chili. Even though I know this is going straight to my ass, at least it's easy on my bank account! Hurray!

Cool people like Sivan, who stay up until ungodly hours as well, to keep me company.

Being able to find shit like this that I normally wouldn't have the patience to look for. Llama llama duck.

Seeing that Molly loves me.

FOOD COMA!!!

Rain, rain, go away.

Or at least rain enough so that classes get cancelled tomorrow, yes?

Things that keep me awake at 2:48 in the morning...

I am flying back to Nashville next Wednesday. You have no idea how much I am looking forward to this. I'm so homesick. I miss my mom, I miss my friends, I miss my bed, I miss the roads, I miss Southern hospitality, I miss the trees, I just miss everything about it. Y'know, if you were to tell me that I would be missing Nashville as much as I do now two years ago, I would have laughed in your face.

But I guess you don't truly appreciate something until you don't have it anymore.

I've been thinking about the life I had back in high school lately. I miss it too. I guess I just had everything going for me. Things were simple, I was kicking ass in school, I had a boyfriend whom I was madly in love with, I hung out with great friends, I had a steady job, my mom was beginning to let go. Life was perfect. And now, I guess I just feel lost. I don't know what I want to do with myself, and I don't know where I'm heading. Don't get me wrong, I'm extremely happy here, but... it's just not the same.

Maybe this is why I love being in Nashville so much. Everytime I'm back, all the good memories come rushing back, and for those few days, I feel like I'm just... home.

Or maybe it's because there's no Hardee's here in Texas, and I really want one of their Monster Thickburgers. 107 grams of fat and 1,420 calories?? I can't wait to get my hands on this individually-wrapped, pre-packaged death.

And Texas - you need a Hardee's. Now.

Anyway, I think I shall be going to bed now, for I must be able to wake up tomorrow morning to stand around and look pretty pass out fliers.

Sigh.

I leave you with the best compliment I've received in a while:

S e h n E 13: you make boring seem FUN

A post of felicitations, promotions, shameless plugs, and blahty blah blah.

First and foremost:

CONGRATULATIONS TO ALPHA SIGMA RHO'S THETA CLASS!





and

GAMMA BETA'S IOTA CLASS!




And while you're at it, come to our presents to see us all dolled up and to congratulate our Theta class this Friday evening.





Now. On to the shameless plugs.

Come to our party this Thursday at Exodus. All proceeds will go to charity for Austin's Children Shelter. C'mon, do it for the kids.

Or at least do it to see hot girls in lingerie without getting a restraining order.



Beautiful flyers created by the beautiful Vivian


That's all for tonight, folks. I'm off to bed.

[Edit]

Yes, I realize there's another party on Thursday night, featuring the one and only, Jin. All I have to say is... Uhm, no. Sorry Jin, you lose.

Case in point:

DjTeknoKid: there is a party on thursday
its tamzilla: jin party?
DjTeknoKid: yeah
its tamzilla: uhh
its tamzilla: jin sucks
DjTeknoKid: thats ur marketing strategy?
its tamzilla: haha
its tamzilla: okay
its tamzilla: hot girls in lingerie
its tamzilla: ... or jin who cant rap, part of ruff ryders (who suck), and whos a big cop out
DjTeknoKid: he is not a ruff ryder anymore
DjTeknoKid: he got rejected
DjTeknoKid: no contest!

Joe and I would like to introduce to you all:

For any of you that will be in Taiwan on July 11, 2005, we present you this challenge.

Starting at 7:11am, we will be walking around Taipei and hitting up every single 7-Eleven we see. And in each 7-Eleven, we will be purchasing one alcoholic beverage each. We will then consume this alcoholic beverage in the streets (because it's legal in Taiwan!) until we stumble upon another 7-11, where we will buy yet another drink. This shall continue until 7:11pm, where we will end the night with some clubbing and then some hot passionate drunken sex.

You in?

It's 11:11 am on 11/11! Make a wish!

Ew, no, not that one.

Saturday night was the Omega's Jocks and Schoolgirls party. This party holds special meaning in my heart only because it was the first house party that I went to in college. So despite being tired and a little sick, I still made it out.

I think I had more fun taking pictures on the way to the house than actually at the party itself. Oh well. Maybe next year.

Pictures provided by Vivian and Joy


Yay! This weekend update has pictures. Pictures of Schoolgirls, nonetheless.

It's like free wanking material for all you perverts. Enjoy!