Much to Danny's dismay, this will not be an awesome Weekend Update post filled with pictures of my drunken self and friends, girls making out, people getting stuck in small places, or even pictures that no one remembers taking in the first place.

Which isn't to say these things didn't happen this weekend, but you know, it's just that we don't have any proof.

Anyway, here's a rough breakdown of what went on in my life these past few days. Yeah yeah, you're actually gonna have to like, read and stuff.

Thursday night we had a mixer with Omega Phi Gamma. I've said it once and I'll say it again: If you don't want to drink, then don't hang out with any Omegas, because they will sit you down, tie you up, and force alcohol down your throat. Okay, not really, but I have never met a group of people who peer pressures as much as they do. And uhm, anything that happened at the house, stays in the house, right?

I love my ASR sisters. Perhaps a little uhm... more than normal?

Damn you, Everclear punch. Damn you. *Shakes fist*

I spent all of Friday recuperating from the previous night. Have you ever tried to learn about 18th century printmaking while hungover?

Around midnight, Connie calls me to go to the GB house with her. We arrive there only to find that EVERYONE was intoxicated. Now, these guys' sexual preferences are already enigmatic to begin with, but when they have a few beers whole Power Hour's worth of alcohol in their systems, they become full-blown homosexual.

After the GB house, I walked home in the rain at 3 in the morning to a completely empty apartment. And to top things off, the electricity went out.

Wow, if that's not pitiful, I'm not sure what is. But thankfully, I had company later that night so I didn't start thinking about scary pale faces in my bathroom mirror, creepy girls with long hair crawling out of my computer screen, or little kids who can see dead people.

Because, you see, that was saved for Saturday night.

Saturday evening, I attended the Lambda Date Dash with Eric. Who is Eric, you might ask? Well, I didn't know either. Kelli called me 20 minutes before we were supposed to meet up and asked me to go with her date's roommate.

Once again, oh, the things I do for a free t-shirt.

No but really, I had a good time. They took us to Z Tejas for dinner, and then to Alamo Drafthouse to watch The Grudge.

Yes, The Grudge. Fuckers.

From what I saw of the movie, it was pretty damn creepy. Although I must admit, the storyline was weak, I was sorely disappointed by Sarah Michelle Gellar's performance, and The Ring was a much better movie. Nonetheless, there were some images in The Grudge that I will never be able to get out of my head.

Especially at 4 in the morning.

Goddamnit. This is why I hate scary movies. But like Stephanie said, Ring 2 - bring it on.

Note to self #1,134: Don't go beer-for-beer with someone ever again. Even if they claim to have an extremely low tolerance.

Note to self #1,135: While drunk-dialing people may seem fun at the time, it won't be the next day when you look in your outgoing logs on your phone only to discover that you've called your ex, someone you haven't talked to in 2 years, and YOUR MOM. And it's also quite embarrassing when you find out you said something along the lines of "I'm horny, come over" to someone. Someone who was completely sober.

However, Stephanie approves.
S e h n E 13: so of the 3 drunken night stories that i was just told over aim, your's is #1
S e h n E 13: congrats

Sunday night was filled with meetings. Long, tedious, boring meetings. However, Vivian and I managed to entertain ourselves by playing a nice game of Hodgy Podgy over AIM while sitting right next to each other. Don't know how to play? It's easy. One person starts off and says a word, and the next says another one, and so forth. You usually end up with some really great sentences.

Example:
PiNK ess enz: TODAY
its tamzilla: I
PiNK ess enz: HAD
its tamzilla: A
PiNK ess enz: BONER
its tamzilla: AND
PiNK ess enz: I
its tamzilla: SUCKED
PiNK ess enz: IT
its tamzilla: .
PiNK ess enz: THEN,
its tamzilla: I
PiNK ess enz: USED
its tamzilla: IT
PiNK ess enz: TO
its tamzilla: PLAY
PiNK ess enz: WITH
its tamzilla: YOUR
PiNK ess enz: HAIR!!!

Other things said:
Skeet in my mouth from your mouth to Julie's eye.
Mark and Lambo like black birds?? However they are totally ambiguously gay!!!
I want to hump a camel toe becuase they are delicious.

You, too, can enjoy this type of entertainment whenever you are in a ridiculously boring meeting/class/church service.

I now leave you with the "Krunkest Interesection in Texas" [Link via LYD]