Hi. I have a huge vagina. Nice to meet you.

its tamzilla: well are you having sexual frustrations?
Name Changed to Protect the Innocent Guilty: i would if it wasn't for all of those hookers.
its tamzilla: haha
its tamzilla: figures
NCtPtG: what? i like crusty loose vaginas.
its tamzilla: you like it where you're able to stick both your hands into them
its tamzilla: and then CLAP.
NCtPtG: like yours?
its tamzilla: exactly.
NCtPtG: i crawled all the way in your vagina once. you were asleep.
its tamzilla: oh hrm. didnt feel a thing
NCtPtG: i thought you might wake up, but it's so big that i actually rode my bike around for a while with no problem.
its tamzilla: aw well im glad you had a good time
NCtPtG: yeah. i was going to do jumping jacks, but i got thirsty so i had to go get a drink.
NCtPtG: OF PEE
NCtPtG: ...
NCtPtG: wait.
NCtPtG: nevermind.

And we wonder why we don't have any friends...